Christian Bale Should Light London Olympic Flame

After David Beckham declared that he did not want to light the flame at next week's opening ceremonies for the London Olympics, the big question now is to whom this honour will fall. Beckham's reason for declining the honour is his belief that it should be done by a past Olympian, of which he is not. This logic is flawed. Whether or not the individual previously competed in the Olympics is irrelevant, it should be about selecting the greatest possible national icon for the symbolic position, regardless of profession. For that reason, the Olympic flame should be lit by none other than British actor Christian Bale. The last installment of the Dark Night series is being released a week ahead of the Games, and will no doubt be the number one movie on the planet when the ceremonies are held. I ran this idea by my teenage nephews, and received their enthusiastic agreement that Batman is the perfect choice.

It can be argued that Christian Bale is the best thing that Britain has ever produced, it's greatest gift to the world. He has far more talent in his craft than Beckham, who is nothing more than glorified sex symbol married to a Spice Girl. He can even light the flame in costume as Batman, that is just a suggestion, not an absolute requirement. The opportunities for commercial cross promotions are limitless.

All that being said, the people of Britain should be ashamed at their failure to control mother nature and make the rain stop. The bad weather is going to become the most significant story of these Olympics, and the Brits inability to control it is deplorable. By the way, some of us Vancouver residents remember the British media slamming the Vancouver Olympic people for bad weather, so this karma fits beautifully. What goes around, comes around, you limey bastards!